the boy has slept alll night in his own room, in his own bed, without boob in his mouth nad i have never been so grateful for anything in my entire life. i was scared to post about it until i was sure it would stick. but it is, and it has, and we never had to make him cry it out.
the formula for success turned out to be:
-a stomach flu which prevented me from putting him down at the breast for a night and made me lose my milk for a few days (it came back, don't worry!)
-changing his routine dramitically during the day to totally mess him up
-reading him stories until he fell asleep in his bed
-and now, just pretending like we are asleep in the same room
it is the best thing ever. thank you to the readers who sent their support during one of the longest, hardest periods of my entire life.
6.29.2006
night weaning: giving up
#1) a failed night weaning experiement: the person who i first heard the term night weaning from confessed to me that she had given up on it and that it was unsuccessful.
#2) more drama: the manny again said "i'll take care of him" last night only ot wake him up and make him highly agitated until i put him down by the breast. i was heartbroken. he had just gotten back from three peaceful days away from home and i thought he would be committed for once.
#3) an outsider's perspecive: my friend jana said she had never seen the boy so clingy and upset during the day or night and that something was really the matter with him because he was acting frightened and troubled.
#4) facing up: i am having to face up to the reality that i am on my own in helping the boy to be settled and calm and off the boob at night. i am coming to understand that "i've got it" when spoken in the middle of the night is a bold-faced lie. i don't want that to be the case. i don't want to keep doing something that doesn't work. i have to help my son.
#5) making changes: all of royce's stuff is in the guest room as of this morning. i (not my husband) will be transitioning him into his own room for the sake of his and my survival. nights are going to be hard around here, but easier than our mangled attempt at night weaning.
#2) more drama: the manny again said "i'll take care of him" last night only ot wake him up and make him highly agitated until i put him down by the breast. i was heartbroken. he had just gotten back from three peaceful days away from home and i thought he would be committed for once.
#3) an outsider's perspecive: my friend jana said she had never seen the boy so clingy and upset during the day or night and that something was really the matter with him because he was acting frightened and troubled.
#4) facing up: i am having to face up to the reality that i am on my own in helping the boy to be settled and calm and off the boob at night. i am coming to understand that "i've got it" when spoken in the middle of the night is a bold-faced lie. i don't want that to be the case. i don't want to keep doing something that doesn't work. i have to help my son.
#5) making changes: all of royce's stuff is in the guest room as of this morning. i (not my husband) will be transitioning him into his own room for the sake of his and my survival. nights are going to be hard around here, but easier than our mangled attempt at night weaning.
6.26.2006
ruining the moment (if ever there was one)
what words offer a verbal cold shower in the heat of the moment between two parents, mr nice guy asks?
some of the best answers are in the comments:
-episiotomy tear
-cheney colonoscopy
-baby's awake
-is it in?
some of the best answers are in the comments:
-episiotomy tear
-cheney colonoscopy
-baby's awake
-is it in?
6.20.2006
night weaning: whats really going on
i am having a lot of trouble:
the manny is sabotaging my night weaning efforts. he offers to put the B down only to get impatient, try to "force" him to sleep before he is ready, gets him all upset, starts fights with me over an upset baby and leaves me to deal with the mess i am talking about this happening four times in the last two weeks and it is very upsetting.
very upsetting indeed. the kind of upsetting that left me bawling on my neighbors doorstep this morning, confused with destructive and depressive thoughts. basically torn apart with dissappointment, contempt, and a feeling of being trapped.
we have been in counseling the last two weeks to get some new tools to deal with the problems we are having, and have not gotten any help there.
yesterday we finally decided that despite the manny's interest in being an "involved dad", it was in everyone's best interests if he stops putting the boy down. it was actually a relief to know that tonight would be different than the last two weeks b/c the manny couldn't fuck it up again. even worse, he couldn't use our innocent baby as a tool to mess with me anymore.
wha'd he do? intentionally wake me and the boy up as he went to bed, the fucker.
the manny is sabotaging my night weaning efforts. he offers to put the B down only to get impatient, try to "force" him to sleep before he is ready, gets him all upset, starts fights with me over an upset baby and leaves me to deal with the mess i am talking about this happening four times in the last two weeks and it is very upsetting.
very upsetting indeed. the kind of upsetting that left me bawling on my neighbors doorstep this morning, confused with destructive and depressive thoughts. basically torn apart with dissappointment, contempt, and a feeling of being trapped.
we have been in counseling the last two weeks to get some new tools to deal with the problems we are having, and have not gotten any help there.
yesterday we finally decided that despite the manny's interest in being an "involved dad", it was in everyone's best interests if he stops putting the boy down. it was actually a relief to know that tonight would be different than the last two weeks b/c the manny couldn't fuck it up again. even worse, he couldn't use our innocent baby as a tool to mess with me anymore.
wha'd he do? intentionally wake me and the boy up as he went to bed, the fucker.
6.15.2006
long time gone...
i've been super busy!
i got a parttime job and have been shooting like crazy each weekend. i am the new photographer and public relations rep for new directions for women, a drug and alcohol treatment center for women, pregnant women, and women with kids. how perfect, right?
we have gone back to nightweaning the boy who has been trying to suckle for 12 hours straight at night.
but i did manage to do this shoot of the two of us, and this photo i love the most of any of us.
i got a parttime job and have been shooting like crazy each weekend. i am the new photographer and public relations rep for new directions for women, a drug and alcohol treatment center for women, pregnant women, and women with kids. how perfect, right?
we have gone back to nightweaning the boy who has been trying to suckle for 12 hours straight at night.
but i did manage to do this shoot of the two of us, and this photo i love the most of any of us.
5.31.2006
bad news goes good (i hope)
our health insurance is up in the air for the ten brazilianth time since the B was concieved. this time because our carrier was bought out by a more expensive plan (read: 25% rate hike) and the rates went up a lot on top of that (read: another 50% hike for a total of 75%.) WTF!!!
i am committed to turning this into a good thing by finding a great individual plan a a better price. but our current insurance is pretty nice, we paid only $100 to have a baby. i don't think that's even possible outside group coverage.
internets: what individual coverage has worked for your family?
i am committed to turning this into a good thing by finding a great individual plan a a better price. but our current insurance is pretty nice, we paid only $100 to have a baby. i don't think that's even possible outside group coverage.
internets: what individual coverage has worked for your family?
5.30.2006
three armed boy
seems that the specialists are unable to determine which of the two left arms is the better developed because both of them are so well formed.sfgate via daddytypes
back home (phew!)
the greyhound: the bus ride wasn't bad, except for having to sit next to my husband at times. the B did quite well, even taking his midnight snack in the sports book in downtown vegas.the trip: seeing family was awesome!!!
the cold: the B and the manny caught the sniffles
the latest photo gig: i am shooting a wedding with sb reader kristal in june. (thanks to her for the wacky food photography, well her and this russian guy)
5.23.2006
going on vacation
i'll be gone until monday, we are going to steamboat springs, colorado. (by greyhound!)
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